Garden Variety Family

new look

I have been tired of wearing the same outfit. The old design was getting a little spoiled. The pink is a nice complement to my skin. Whatta ya think?

Happy Sunday.

best packet yet!

Well, we received what looks to me to be the best packet of information yet!  Great Wall China Adoption agency does China only adoptions.  It makes me feel more comfortable that their singular focus is China.  They sent a DVD that outlined their whole program.  Other agencies sent DVD's that were just fluffy music videos that featured an adoption theme.  They are definitely emotional and pull at your heartstrings, making you want to do an adoption but they just don't tell you much about it.  I feel like this is the first agency that gave us the closest idea of what the whole process will be like from beginning to end.

Thank you Great Wall!

sow it up with red thread

Steve and I have decided that we will adopt from China.  It feels great to know at least that.   We were very drawn to Kazakhstan, because of the possibility of adopting a Eurasian child and because of the beauty and mystery of the country, but after mulling it over we decided that China is best for us. 

I guess it is kinda like "making" a baby the biological way...it starts with a feeling and you just kinda go with it. 

We would like to give a home to a girl from China because so many girls are abandoned simply because they are girls.  China has a "one child policy" therefore, so many many children end up in orphanages.  China's process seems fairly predictable and the children are healthy.

Then I happened upon and ancient Chinese proverb that is splattered over many adoption blogs and Chinese adoption sites. 

"An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet; regardless of time, place or circumstances.  The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break." 

The first time I read it, I was overcome with a misty feeling that there is a baby who hasn't even been born yet -- in a country so far away -- who's thread is attached to mine and as we both pick it up and follow it, hand over hand, to see where it leads we will meet eye to eye, face to face for the first time and we will know that we are meant to be joined heart to heart.  No thought, at this time is, more beautiful to me.  I like to apply that same sentiment to all the relationships in my life. 

So I created the graphic to the right to illustrate this beautiful thought. 

an agency meeting

So the day came to attend an informational seminar about international adoption. My mom met us there to help us absorb all the information we were going to get. We arrived right on time and as I started to step over the threshold of the meeting room I was overcome by overwhelming emotion and anticipation. I had to step back and cry into my wonderful husband's shoulder. I took about 30 seconds to recover, then we forded through the doorway and took a seat with my husband's hand in mine.

The presenter was down-to-earth and frank.

At the beginning I think that the 5 couples present must have felt like deer in headlights, slowly we started asking questions and sharing some of the research we have done.

When it was over my husband, my mom and I just sat there weighted by information. My mom got her first glimpse into what is involved. By the end there were more tears. I just wanted to choose this agency because I got some personal contact and I am tired of looking at information packets and trying to compare.

a few drops of water added

I know this is going to be the beginning of a lot of water, a lot of research, money and emotional energy.

The adoption catalogs for many agencies are starting to roll in. We don't know how to choose! Some agencies information comes in large slick presentation and cost $5 to mail, others are more conservative in size and only cost $2 to mail. I think to myself, "If they spent $5 they have more overhead than those who spent $2, so maybe they are going to charge more....." maybe I am being irrational but you really don't know how forthright they are being about costs. What about "hidden fees" or mysterious "unforseen costs" I know we have to be flexible and we are prepared (well semi-prepared) for the large costs, but these are people who are helping us add to our family! There are very emotional hopes and expectations riding on this huge decision.

We are going to our first informational meeting for an agency which, I've found through my online research, doesn't even post a fee schedule on their web-site. They're the only one I've seen thus far that doesn't give you some kind of an idea of how much of an investment its going to be. To me that is like walking into a fancy boutique where there are no prices on the products, you just know that you should just turn right back around and walk out!

a seed is planted

We are trying to have a family. We are a family, a very happy family of two. But...we have decided to expand our family. My husband and I feel like we have a lot of love, talents, interests and perspectives that we think we could share with a child to help them grow into adulthood---so we would like to become parents.

We are going to have to try really hard, because we don't know what we are doing. Trust me, we know how babies are made, and we know how to do it! However, we have chosen to pursue an international adoption and that, we know almost nothing about! So our seed has been planted in our minds and in our hearts and we know that at the end of this long and unpredictable "gestation" of paperwork and preparations we will have a child.

This blog is intended to be an exploration of our journey to add another bloom in our garden variety family by extra-ordinary means.